If you were born with the weakness to fall, you were born with the strength to rise. Rupi Kaur I find myself wishing the days away, especially the high pain days. I am a clock
If you were born with the weakness to fall, you were born with the strength to rise.Rupi Kaur
I find myself wishing the days away, especially the high pain days. I am a clock watcher on those days and look forward to the evening when I can curl up into a ball and let the fight of the day come to an end. It feels like I am just wishing my life away.
I used to be such a morning person. Not now. Now, I find that I no longer look forward to waking up most days. Mainly because I know when I wake up I will be met with an intense ache all over, among other symptoms. I will be overwhelmed and immediately regretful that I have come to and will want to close my eyes, go right back to sleep, and ignore the world.
But, that is not what I do. I get up, or at least I try to. At the very least I acknowledge the day is here, or again, I try to. Most days the pain will try to keep me distracted from life, family, friends, and even from processing my own thoughts.
It is when I struggle that I strengthen. It is when challenged to my core that I learn the depth of who I am.Steve Maraboli
As I struggle with my body, I struggle with my mind. I fight against the changes that are altering the core of who I am. I know that some changes are for the better, but I have a hard time letting go of who I used to be and what I used to be capable of. I have a tendency to feel somehow ‘less than’ instead of recognizing the positive growth that has come from this.
Growth is inevitable as we go through life and each challenge that we are able to overcome can make us stronger. Through that challenge we learn about our will, our drive, and our determination. We learn where our threshold really is. Just when you think you can’t take any more, you will. I need to remind myself to keep my focus on my strengths, instead of focusing on the things I have lost.
If we don’t change, we don’t grow. If we don’t grow, we aren’t really livingGail Sheehy
I’ve grown, and not in the way that I thought I would. I don’t think that I would’ve ever slowed down enough before this to really enjoy life, you know? I mean, really enjoy it. I think I just skimmed the surface of life before and now I feel it all, for better or worse. Perhaps life hardens us as we age and something like becoming ill can really put things back in perspective.
Regardless, I am changed. I am not ‘less than’, but I am different. There is a sense of adventure with change that can be very exciting. Otherwise, I think we stay where we feel safe and comfortable. I haven’t felt comfortable for a long while, so I might as well keep doing things that force me outside of my comfort zone. I will continue to rise above it.